Look! An opportunity to procrastinate! Find out which freshman residence hall best represents your personality.
1. Where are you most likely to vomit?
- a. On the sidewalk
- b. On your roommate
- c. In the elevator
- d. In your suitemate’s bed
- e. On your professor during office hours
2. What annoys you most about your roommate?
- a. Sexiling. So much. Sexiling.
- b. Significantly cooler and hotter than me
- c. Once managed to spill half a bottle of vodka onto my bed sheets and then tried to lick the vodka out
- d. He/she sets that motherfucking alarm for 6 AM every morning
- e. He/she is trying to convert me to Scientology
3. How often do you call your mom?
- a. Every day
- b. Only when I have to lie about when parents’ weekend is
- c. When I need sex advice
- d. When I need more money after spending it all on weed pencils
- e. I’m Batman. I have no parents.
4. It’s 9 PM on Tuesday. You are:
- a. Setting up a temporary sleeping quarters on D-level
- b. Pre-gaming
- c. Asleep
- d. Watching Gossip Girl
- e. Preparing for my ritual sacrifice
5. Why do you go to the library?
- a. To socialize
- b. To study
- c. To complete the D-level challenge
- d. So my parents think I’m studying
- e. To collect fuel for my bonfire
6. Who do you most identify with?
- a. President Daniels
- b. Ronny D, yo
- c. Kim Kardashian
- d. Jay-Z during the elevator incident
- e. I’ve always felt like Richard Nixon was just misunderstood
7. What’s your favorite song?
- a. “Anaconda (CLEAN)” by Nicki Minaj
- b. “Anaconda (EXPLICIT)” by Nicki Minaj
- c. Any Coldplay song
- d. “Turn Down For What” by DJ Snake and Lil’ Jon
- e. That U2 album Apple forced down my throat
Mostly A’s: you are the Buildings!
Who are you? Nobody knows! You’re probably pretty lame though.
Mostly B’s: you are the AMRs!
Like the AMRs, you have poor temperature control, so you’re probably really hot and sweaty all the time. You’re pretty social, and it’s surprising how much people actually want to hang out with you since you’re so sweaty all the time.
Mostly C’s: you are Wolman!
The most deluxe dorm of them all! Maybe that’s why people think you’re really pretentious and needy. Well, they’re right.
Mostly D’s: you are McCoy!
Pretty much a Wolman wannabe, you only think you’re as pretentious as Wolman. Face it: you’ll never be as popular.
Mostly E’s: you are Hopkins Inn!
You’re only here because the freshman class overenrolled. At least we don’t have to see you much. Weirdo.