First Circle: Limbo. These are the people on Tyler Terrace or the Upper Quad. They look happy. They just came from class. They walk by MSE on their way home. They are dead, but they don’t know it.

Second Circle: Lust. These people hang at Q Level, trying to figure out whether or not they want to enter MSE. They are dead, still don’t know it, but are questioning everything. What is life. Where have my choices led me. They crave answers. They think MSE will give them these answers.

Third Circle: Gluttony. Before one enters Brody, one must walk by all those too scared to enter the building, so they hide at Brody Cafe. They stuff their faces with expensive coffee drinks, or, if they didn’t have time to eat, with old samosas (the food of the Devil). Vouyeristically they stare, openly, at the people of the Seventh Circle.

Fourth Circle: Greed. The people of the Fourth Circle sit in the Reading Room of Brody, leaving their shit at one spot and disappearing for hours at a time while they visit the Third Circle. They also spread their shit across desks to save seats for their friends. Bastards.

Fifth Circle: Anger. The people in the Fifth Circle are the A Level kids who lack the ability to shut the fuck up, making everyone around them want to commit crimes more heinous than those that brought them to Inferno in the first place.

Sixth Circle: Heresy. These are the contentious people who barter their souls for study rooms in Brody, B Level, and C Level.

Seventh Circle: Violence. The people of the Brody Atrium steal expo markers, rip leg rests from under the feet of their peers, and punch people for seats in the comfy chairs.

Eighth Circle: Fraud. The two-stalled bathrooms in MSE that are actually pits of despair. They lie to you. You sit on a literal throne of lies.